My friends, I have been listening to a phenomenal sermon series on relationships, marriage, sex, singleness, and spirituality called From the Beginning: Relationships That Give Life by J.D. Greear. It is so beautiful and completely perfect for this season of life I’m in right now.
I just listened to the second episode. Some things I have taken away from it thus far …
– I was created to be a nurturer.
– I was designed to be in community.
– I was created to be immersed in God’s family.
– I was designed for heaven.
– I was created for God.
I was not created “for singleness” or “for marriage”. Though I am single right now, and God is blessing me, growing me, and preparing me to be with Him. And I am excited about the possibility of being married one day, where God can continue to bless me, grow me, and prepare me to be with Him! ❤
I’ve long since desired to be married, and have been dreaming about it ever since I was a little girl. At times in my life, it has become an idol. It has taken forefront in my mind and seeped all the joy out of my life because I lacked it. I have believed that it would fulfill me. That I would finally be complete. That I would at last have a purpose. A job. An identity.
But God has showed me otherwise. I believe He has continually asked me to surrender this desire to Him, and, quite reluctantly, I have learned too. Sometimes I snatch it back in panic, and have to surrender it again and again!
But the point is, He brought me to the realization that the desire for marriage can be an idol for me, and He has been teaching me how to lay that idol to rest.
Still, as I learn and find more deeply Jesus Christ as my everything … I struggle.
And this series, From the Beginning, spoke to those struggles. That fear of being alone. That craving to have children. That instilled need to nurture. These are normal, natural, God-designed things, I believe – and I don’t have to be married for them to be fulfilled!
Number One: I need to find my true Hope in God.
Number Two: I need to be, deeply, a part of the church family. I need to have mentors. Be a mentor. Nurture children and those younger than myself. Be an example and confidant to teen girls. Be a friend. Be a companion – a listener. Serve. Gather wisdom from those wiser than myself. Share with others what God has taught me. Laugh. Work together. Eat together. Do life together.
I would like to be married someday, but right now, I don’t have to be alone. God’s family should surround me and be there for me – and I be there for them.
I would like to be a mother someday, but right now, I don’t have to have empty arms and no one to nurture. I should open my arms to the lonely children, open my heart to the impressionable younger girls around me.
My identity is found in Christ.
I am who I’m supposed to be simply as a child of God.
Although marriage is a beautiful gift, I am not missing out on anything right now as a single. I am not less of a person. I’m not “yet to be complete”. I’m not lacking in experience or not part of a family.
Because though biological families are wonderful and dear, GOD’S FAMILY IS MUCH DEEPER. It is much closer. Much fuller. Much more beautiful and meaningful and forever.
And I am a part of that family. I am a part of something right now. This is what I was created for.
How freeing, how joyful to know this! 🙂
My identity is not found in marriage. I am not alone. I am not unable to nurture. “Marriage” or “singleness” is not the goal – growing closer to God is.
And if marriage is in my future … Lord, I’m so excited! I can’t wait to see how You unfold my love story. If motherhood is in my future, I can’t wait to hold those tiny, sweet-smelling, downy-headed babies.
But right now in this moment, I know who I am and that my hope is in my Lord, and I can find such deep fulfillment in being intricately part of His family. Loving. Serving. Listening. Laughing. Nurturing. Mentoring. Talking. Being loved. (And if marriage comes my way, this is still every bit as true and needful!)
May you rest in His joy and His perfect path, my dear ones. ❤